I promised a piece on Spirituallity... I'm not sure if this is it, but it's the closest I've come so far:
I am someone who falls in love every day and when you fall in love, life doesn’t usually show up at the door knocking with roses and candy. Love is tough as shit. I find that the moments filled with the highest amplitude of love are often coupled with what feel like the lowest of blows. We could just say that after the high of love, it is easy to feel down. But I think it is more than that. Life is full of tests, not in the form of intention or fate, in the form of energy. In yoga class I call it a zip-zap when someone accidently reaches out and touches a neighbor to extend into a posture. The amount of energy coursing through our physical bodies and the material world around us is astounding. I can only imagine then amount of energy coming at us that we can’t perceive with our 5 main senses.
So the tests are those of action and reaction, what happens when you get zip-zapped? Yoga is the practice of controlling your own energy so that you can then go out live in the world both efficiently and effectively. WARNING: Yoga may also fill you with an extreme amount of love for all things in this universe. I think these two things are directly related. When you begin to be in the world at your fullest capacity it is easier to be happy and happiness is the purest form of love. Yoga is: equalizing our actions with our hearts, creating space for love and realizing that it all comes from within, from the soul.
When I realized the person I was trying to be and the person I truly am are in fact the same person, everything changed for me. There is no more questioning how I got here or where I am going. I mean, honestly I ask myself these questions every day... But the freedom is giving up the search for answers.