Anticipation is a Bitch

When I was in high school a best friend and I had this motto, “Don’t think things through and have no expectations.” The thing is, if we think things through we automatically have expectations of how they may play out in the future. And certain things in life require some planning ahead. Also, we know visualization is an amazing tool that helps us manifest our realities. So what gives?

I woke up at 3 am for my 5:40 flight only to have received an automated voicemail from the airline notifying me that my flight was cancelled due to “unforeseen events” and I would be flying out tomorrow. I couldn’t help but feel stripped of my reality, I SHOULD be on a plane right now. I WANT to go to the beach this afternoon, I NEED to touch the ocean. After enough of these thoughts and a few early morning phone calls I got back in bed and thought, “Who the fuck AM I?!” One more day in VT means lunch at Wilaiwan’s, taking a class at the studio, activating my new ATM card, a long muddy walk with the earthy springtime air.

Having no expectations means letting go of the “I” or “me” in the situation. Not allowing the bullshit circumstances to shake or break you is the real yoga. The amount of energy that comes at us everyday is overwhelming. When we practice, we are simply filtering, processing and recycling our energy in a way that invokes a state of bliss. This state is called many things: samadhi, union, enlightenment, nirvana, surrender, super-consciousness, absorption.

But here’s the real clincher, we must me disciplined enough that we also do not form attachment to that state. It is not something we create, it exists in the entire universe and is accessible to all beings. So we don’t “own” or have any rights to this bliss, it is innate, universal love. It is not yours, or mine, or theirs; it is everything. The art of letting go is something I’m still working with deeply and daily. Today I am ultra-thankful to be able to sleep a few extra hours, practice Second Series with my friends and try again for a safe and on time flight tomorrow… maybe…

Peace out VT homies, the Caribbean is calling!!! xo